On my desert island

Since binning our TV set in 2001, we’ve become big fans of radio.

The UK’s longest running radio show is the inspiration for this page. Desert Island Discs lets us get to know a guest, but not just through an interview.

In brief, the “castaways” are asked to name the eight music tracks they would want on a desert island.

It’s a great way to get to know people, so let’s give it a go, but with a twist. Why stop at music?

Oh yes, before we dive in, along with The Bible and complete works of William Shakespeare, they’re also invited to select a luxury item and a book to take to the island too.

So, my luxury item will be an eternal cheese and wine party.

For the book? I think the owner’s manual for the Bosch HBA63B150B built-in oven. It would be great to think that if I ever got rescued, when I got home I’d know how to knock out a couple of slices of toast with that little bad boy.

My Desert Island Discs

  • Hanging Around - The Stranglers
  • Voodoo Ray - A Guy Called Gerald
  • Can You Dig It? - The Mock Turtles
  • Scared - Lucid
  • The Creator Has a Masterplan – Brooklyn Funk Essentials (bit of a guilty secret)
  • Heroes – David Bowie
  • Gymnopedie 1 – Erik Satie
  • Still Waters – Jim White

My Desert Island Cheeses

  • Torta del Casar (once described as like eating ashtrays)
  • Shropshire Blue
  • Cheddar
  • Kefalotyri (delicious pan seared)
  • Reblochon (transformed when cooked in a tartiflette)
  • Garganta de Cares
  • Camembert Calvados
  • Queso Fresco (fresh bread, tomato, olive oil and oregano)

My Desert Island Movies

  • Groundhog Day
  • Reservoir Dogs
  • Heathers
  • 2001: A Space Oddyssey
  • Crybaby
  • Carry On Up the Khyber
  • Anchorman
  • The Italian Job (the original one)

My Desert Island Meals

  • Fresh Baked Sourdough Bread and Cheeseboard
  • Calamares a la Romana
  • Spicy Bean Soup with Lentil Bread Toast
  • Lentil Wellington and Roast Potatoes
  • Chicken Vindaloo
  • Homemade Pizza
  • Greek Salad with Fresh Crusty Bread
  • Full English Breakfast (just not too often)

My Desert Island Punchlines

  • I thought, ''He's trying to pull a fast one"
  • Why the long face?
  • One's a crusty bus station and the other's a busty crustacean
  • Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you
  • It was a shitzu
  • What the hell was that all about?
  • I can't make Tuesdays
  • I'll give it a go, just don't hit me so hard around the head with the ashtray!

My Desert Island Toys and Games

  • Scalextric (if that's a British thing, TCR was pretty good too)
  • Lego (when it was just bricks)
  • Mousetrap
  • Jenga
  • Etch-A-Sketch
  • Atari 2600
  • Top Trumps (think this was a British thing too)
  • Tonka Trucks

My Desert Island Hates

  • Skelmersdale
  • Fennel seeds in hummus (why does she do that?)
  • Arrogant atheists (I hope I'm non-arrogant)
  • Combination of the name of a religion with the word "terrorist"
  • Chewing wool
  • Pigeons
  • Politicians who think they're more imortant than those they serve
  • The Italian Job - 2003 remake (why Wahlberg, why?)

My Desert Island Cartoon Characters

  • Top Cat
  • Hong Kong Phooey
  • Yogi Bear
  • Bugs Bunny
  • Pepe le Pew
  • Mutley
  • Wile E Coyote
  • Marine Boy

My Desert Island Christmas Songs

  • Christmas Wrapping - The Waitresses
  • Santa Claus - The Sonics
  • The Little Drummer Boy/Peace on Earth - Bing Crosby and David Bowie
  • Fairy Tale of New York - The Pogues and Kirtsy MacColl
  • Last Christmas - Wham
  • Frosty the Snowman - Cocteau Twins
  • Do They Know It's Christmas? - Band Aid
  • Merry Xmas Everybody - Slade

Photo by Sean O. on Unsplash